• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Inspired By Nick

be good to your body

  • Home
  • Nourish
    • Recipes
    • Restaurants
    • Brunch
    • Vegan
  • Wellness
  • Lifestyle
    • Travel
    • Home
    • Events
  • Food For Thought
    • Seven Moments
    • The Low Down
  • About Nick

How Friendships and Building Communities Contribute to Health + Longevity

May 23, 2018 by Nick Joly 1 Comment

can friend help you live longer

In Buddhism there’s a single term that encompasses multiple types of friendship; Kalyāṇa-mittatā. It represents the overarching concept of “spiritual friendships” within their community, whereby friendships are formed by individuals who share similar ethical values, as well as a mutual pursuit of enlightenment.

I like that. The mutual pursuit of enlightenment.

I like to look at friendship as the collective energy of two (or more) people.

Think about the energy you give off after having gotten into a argument with a disagreeable colleague at work, versus the energy you give off after having spent time bonding or laughing in the company of close friends.

Lighter, happier.

The beauty of friendship is that it is elective. There are no contractual obligations or blood relations. We choose our friends, just as we choose our environments, in order to grow.

Spiritually, emotionally, physically.

The friends we choose to surround ourselves with, are ultimately the environments in which we choose to grow.

how friendship contributes to good health

Just as a plant blossoms in an environment suited to its needs, so do we. A maple tree could never grow unless its seeds were planted into the earth (its environment), with the right amount of water and exposure to the sun’s rays. If the seeds remain in a glass jar, the tree will never grow.

A personal mantra that I’ve often shared with you is “our vibes attract our tribes”.

The energy we emit into the world will attract similarly “charged” people. Positivity attracts positivity.

Life isn’t linear, and having a network of friends is tantamount to having a support system during the oscillating good times and bad. Ultimately though, the key benefit that I see in true friendship, long term or short, is that it makes life better.

The link between friendship + health?

health benefits of friendship and community

In contrast to friendship, is loneliness, which can be a vortex of self-criticism and emotional instability. We’ve all been there, to some degree or another. The disappointment after a group of friends bail on plans at the last minute. The self-doubt that sinks in from the all-consuming thoughts that surface from spending too much time alone. Severe loneliness has been found to lead to varying degrees of depression, and even an increase in one’s risk of dying early (by up to 26%).

When the safety net or comfort that comes from having a supportive community is removed, we begin to see the world as a threatening environment. When this occurs, the associated physiological effects include higher blood pressure, anxiety and increased heart rate. Over time, these conditions can wreak havoc on our immune and cardiovascular systems.

Friendship has a bigger impact on our psychological well-being than family relationships.

Rebecca G. Adams, a professor of sociology at the University of North Carolina, Greensboro, says that, “friendship has a bigger impact on our psychological well-being than family relationships.” – more here.

Added benefits of having a well-tended community of friends and support system in place include the ability to better:

  • Fight illness and depression,
  • Reduce the aging process and increase one’s longevity,
  • Promote brain health as we get older.

So why does it sting so badly when a friend decides to leave us?! Or subsequently, how do we know when when the time is right for us to end a friendship?

the connection and benefits of friendship and health

When a friend consciously chooses to exit our lives, the pain can run deep. The emotional reaction of feeling hurt occurs because we begin to think that perhaps the safety net associated with that friendship may have been an illusion all along. Were they ever really my friend?

It’s also a question of our own judgment and self-views. Was I wrong in judging their character? Is there something about my character that is unloveable? Or is there an external force, influencing them toward another direction?

Setting aside the selfish aspect of friendship (in how it helps us to grow or how it benefits us), we have to ask ourselves: does this friend help me to become a better person?

Am I emotionally independent when I’m with this person?

I truly believe that we cannot achieve our full potential, or greatness, without the support and care that comes from profound friendships and relationships with others. Because of this, it becomes paramount to elect friends who encourage you to be a better person, and who emit a positive energy.

The more negative a person or group of persons, if we continue to expose ourselves to that toxic energy (yes, toxic) it can almost feel insurmountable to break free from their patterns of behaviours. Gossip, speaking ill of others, or simply just complaining and being unhappy together.   

With that said, looking at friendship from both angles; a collective energy and a mutual pursuit of enlightenment, it’s important to know when to blow the candle out on a friendship that is no longer serving us.

If after spending time with a friend, you’re left feeling insulted, unhappy, emotionally unfulfilled, resentful, or just drained and tired, it may be that time. Tell them how they make you feel, first. And if it persists, you have to look out for your emotional and psychological well-being.

We can elect to no longer be in each other’s lives, we can inadvertently hurt that other person, we can be hurt by them, and sometimes the friendship flame can fizz out on it’s own.

A big part of self-care is having the courage to blow the candle out on friendships that leave us feeling hurt, worthless, drained or insulted.

We are all on the pursuit of happiness, well-being and enlightenment. Each and every one of us. So the purpose of friendship, is really to find a symbiotic relationship that supports one another’s pursuit.

Friendship is a mutually beneficial relationship – or at least it should be; we lean on each other and we help one another to grow.

When you’ve found a group of friends, or even just a select few (studies show health benefits stem from a network of 3-4 or more), hang on to them tightly. Friendships CAN last a lifetime, when the environments are tended to carefully, and effort and support are reciprocal. The benefits can run deep, too, via mind, body, and spirit.

friendship contributes to longevity

Photographs by: Tom Reynolds of Tom Reynolds Photography and Moussa Faddoul of Fotoreflection.
Shot on site: The Loft Hotel, Montreal, QC. April 16, 2016.
Classic black bow ties sponsored by Bows-n-Ties.


Nick Joly | Inspired by Nick
#begoodtoyourbody
inspiredbynick.com

Filed Under: Food For Thought, Health & Fitness, Life.Inspired Tagged With: Friendship, Friendship and Good Health, Friendship and Longevity, Inspired By Nick

Previous Post: « DIY All Natural + Chemical-Free Surface Cleaner
Next Post: 28 Lessons Learned in Health, Happiness, and Spiritual Enlightenment »

Reader Interactions

Trackbacks

  1. 28 Lessons I’ve Learned in Health, Happiness, and Spiritual Enlightenment - INSPIRED BY NICK says:
    May 25, 2018 at 1:17 pm

    […] 2. Friendships are more important than we think. They contribute to a higher quality of life, and deliver profound benefits to the mind, body and sou… […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recipe Rating




This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

ABOUT NICK

inspired by nick blog profile photo

Hey there! Welcome to Inspired by Nick, a space where I share inspiration on food, health & lifestyle. Stay for a while, have a read, and say hello if you like!

INSTAGRAMS

inspiredbynick

serving you post-workout sweat and redness realnes serving you post-workout sweat and redness realness rn 💪🏼🥵💦 and I just got these super convenient deodorant wipes from @forwardwithdesign for when I have to jump from lunchtime workouts to a zoom call during the week 🤫 now you know my secret! 😂 AD #forwardwithdesign #inspiredbynick
There’s 4587 inches of snow outside but I’m ju There’s 4587 inches of snow outside but I’m just gonna focus on the fact that at least it’s sunny ☀️ and I can seek warmth from my little #oatbowl topped with all the fixins: fresh berries🫐, peanut butter, banana 🍌, @royal_nuts chopped walnuts and a sprinkle @organictraditions prebiotic sorghum cereal, and coconut flakes 🥥 topped on  @bobsredmill organic oats 🙃 #oatmealbowl #oatsforbreakfast #inspiredbynick
Patio season is gonna hit different this year and Patio season is gonna hit different this year and I’ll be ready to pounce! 🐆🐾🥂☀️
Grocery shopping but 'leveled up' 💁🏻‍♂️🍄 y’all know that food shopping is basically my favourite hobby 😂. Over the past few weeks, I’ve told you about #MyHealthMyChoices by @MetroOntario and now I’m gonna show you just how easy it is to sort and find foods you love, while fitting within your dietary needs.
—
I always start in produce (naturally) and then jump straight to organic aisles for my fav snacks. Using the green labels in-store, I can identify (at a quick glance) which products are plant-based, vegan, or gluten-free. The My Health, My Choices program also allows me to scan product barcodes using the MyMetro app and search for exactly what I need, taking the whole experience to the next level 🙌🏼 ➡️ Swipe to see my shopping experience and what items I picked up at my local Metro. #Sponsored #MyMetro #Inspiredbynick
we’ve moved into our home 🏡 and we’re still we’ve moved into our home 🏡 and we’re still taking time to settle in. there are some projects we wanna get done asap but can’t due to lockdown, so we’re just gonna go with the flow and enjoy the ride together 👬🏻 ps, that photo is from 9 years ago on one of our first dates
When you’re craving a burger but you also want a When you’re craving a burger but you also want a #meatless option 🙌🏼🍔 Organic Black Bean Fiesta Burgers made by yours truly 🍔💁🏻‍♂️when I was vegan I really had to get creative with a lot of my recipes, otherwise I’d be eating the same old bean salad every day… and bean salad doesn’t really taste like a burger when you’re craving a burger! Even though I’m not fully vegan anymore, I do still like to swap out meat as much as possible with other #plantbased options because that’s what works for me! 
With @metroontario's new program, MyHealth, MyChoices finding products that suit your dietary needs and lifestyles couldn't be easier. With almost 9,000 products labelled with nearly 50 different attributes like plant-based, fat-free, non-GMO, etc., you can easily find what works for you. So for this recipe, I looked for the green labels in-store, found the perfect Irresistibles organic black beans and extra virgin olive oil and whipped up a batch of patties that my heartmate and I devoured! (Tip: they also freeze well)! The recipe for them is on my blog (link in bio) and on Metro’s Instagram page and website! Hope you enjoy these if you decide to make them! #inspiredbynick  #MyHealthMyChoices #mymetro #sponsored
Monday? Too ruff for me... Wake me up when it’s Monday? Too ruff for me... Wake me up when it’s the weekend please and thank you! 🐕🐾 #pawsup #rufflife
I hope our paths croissant again 🥐😂 the best I hope our paths croissant again 🥐😂 the best almond croissants from gourmet privilège 🥰 #nationalcroissantday
At-home yoga for the winnn! 🧘🏻‍♂️🌿✨ because even though supporting my local yoga studio looks different now than in the past (classes are all online or through their app), I can still feel good about being a paying member and doing a small part to #supportlocal. 
-
I am not THE poster child for supporting local, that’s just the truth, but I do what I can, where I can. Honestly, I do miss being in the hot studio where after a class I would be drenched and feeling so accomplished, ironically though, I’m surprisingly still drenched after a 90 min class at home, more so than I thought I would be! So I still feel good about getting my workout in, even if it’s different than being there in person. 
- 
Anyone who does yoga regularly like me knows a wet bag is essential after a good flow. The team at @forwardwithdesign have this awesome bag (I link to it in my stories) that I love--it’s super practical and I love the cute print! While I’m not getting as much use out of it as I’d like right now, it will definitely be coming with me to the studio when some of our restrictions lift and small businesses open up again!! AD #ForwardWithDesign #ThatsFWDThinking  #InspiredbyNick
I really miss having people over for charcuterie b I really miss having people over for charcuterie boards and drinks 🕺🏻🍸🥑🧀🥕🫒 and am LONGING for the days when I can host a dinner party again! Tagged a few of the brands of foods on this board, including @miyokoscreamery’s #vegancheese which was to die forrrrr! 🙌🏼✨ happy Friday Junior. y’all! 
On the board: 
Dark chocolate 
Organic berries 
Mixed olives 
Mixed nuts - cashews, pecans, almonds 
Breadsticks 
Crackers 
Rainbow carrots
Vegan party platter hors d’oeuvres
Figs (obvi) 
And a spicy chutney!
Load More... Follow on Instagram

MY WEIGHT LOSS + FITNESS JOURNEY

personal weight loss how I lost 100 pounds

How I Lost 100+ lbs and Changed My Life

Read my story

SUBSCRIBE

💌 Say hello!

PO Box 40549
Kirkland, Montreal, QC. 
H9H-5G8

Copyright © 2021 · Foodie Pro Theme by Shay Bocks · Built on the Genesis Framework · Powered by WordPress